Wetlook World Forum

Message # 21731.2.1.1.1

Subject: Re: No need to be so negative!

Date: Wed 12/04/06 00:30:03 GMT

Name: klm4748

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By AnthonyX - anthonyx@jowc.net Tue 11/04/06 21:22:47 GMT

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"There are lots of single woman looking for great men, just be yourself. The right girl is out there waiting for you." is a bit trite and not all that helpful.

I have spent most of my adult life (25+ out of my current 47 years) dating in search of a compatible woman to settle down with, and I haven't found her yet. You must have gotten something somewhat right to find yourself married - if only briefly - so you appear to be at least a little more successful than I.

However, I think I can offer a few perspectives which may be useful here.

o   Attitude is very important. If you go in thinking about your previous failures, you're not likely to succeed. Just as you're aware of a prospective date's attitude, she will be aware of yours - probably more so.

o   It's a numbers game. You're not going to find the right woman until you've filtered your way through at least some number of women who are not "right" or simply not interested. That number could be very few, or in my case, HUNDREDS. Taken from sales advice: the best you can do to keep your motivation up in face of rejection is to view it as "each rejection brings you one step closer to your eventual success".

o   If you acknowledge that dating is a numbers game, you can start to think about the idea of improving your odds, and "strategize" by focusing on the qualities you seek in companion and where/how you're most likely to meet women with such qualities.

o   Give some serious thought to what truly are "must-have" qualities, what are "nice-to-have" qualities, and what qualities are not important in a companion. Be realistic.

o   When you go in search of a companion, only concern yourself with the "must-have"s. You can live without the "nice-to-have"s, right?

o   Don't make "desire to get wet" a "must-have"; look for open-mindedness instead. An open mind is easier to spot, much easier to build and maintain a relationship with, and can be introduced to wetlook if and when appropriate.

o   Women are people too. It's amazing what they will do for you if just treat them as such. A little respect and compromise can often go a long way.

o   It's amazing what you can accomplish with a little open communication. Women seem to be much better at it than we are, but it is a skill even us primitive men can improve with a little effort.

o   If being yourself doesn't work, maybe a few tweaks are in order.

Utah??? Mormon??? I suspect that the same mormons who require their women to be married and not to disrobe in the bath are the same ones who participate in polygamy. The global ratio of men:women is about 1:1 (actually slightly more men than women). So, for each additional wife a polygamous male has, some other male somewhere is left single. Somehow I suspect you'd find yourself in a situation where there is a surplus of single men because there are no single women at all.

By Barry - barryseaweed@yahoo.com Tue 11/04/06 17:49:48 GMT

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Here's some advice for you:  dating advice coming from women never works!

"There are lots of single woman looking for great men, just be yourself. The right girl is out there waiting for you."

I'm 34,  I'm currently divorced.  My marriage only lasted for two and a half years.  I got divorced back in '02 and I've been looking ever since and since that time and I hear that line probably once a week.  Just be yourself,  PLEASE, it hasn't worked yet, logic tells me that if hasn't worked in the past, it's not gonna start working!

Here's some more advice from my personal experience.  Dating advice coming from "John Tesh, Music and Intelligence for Your Life" never works either!  A while back somebody called in and said "I've followed all of the dating advice on your show, and I've been turned down 250 times."  I would have called in with that complaint myself, but that other guy beat me to it!

I am able to get a few dates, it's just that they're all dry and boring.  My ex-wife was dry and boring.  Here's the difference between men and women:  Us guys, we tell women what turns us on and they don't do it no matter how simple.  The women, they don't tell us what turns them on and we gotta figure it out by trial and error!  In the case of my EX, it was all error, all the time!

Since advice coming from women, John Tesh, and that worthless collection of crap Barnes and Nobles calls it's Realationship and Dating books just doesn't work, we're going to have to try something else!

I'm not picky.  All I want is a wife who will get wet in a shirt with shorts or pants and socks every once in a while.  I'd be more than thrilled with a clothed dip in the tub once a month or maybe a jump off the pier at the lake every once in a while.

Here's my plan:  I saw this thing on TV about Mormons in Utah once.  Mormons are required to swim in full clothing.  The TV news segment showed a group of Mormon girls swimming in shirts, long pants, socks, and sandals.   Not only that, someone told me once they're required to shower in their underwear.  I don't know if that's true or not, that's what Howard Stern said on his show once.  I looked in to it a little and Mormons believe it's a sin to stay single.  I'm thinking about moving to Utah and becoming a Mormon.  They have single girls who are told it's their obligation to marry, and they're required to get wet.  That's my idea.  If someone has another idea THAT WORKS I'd like to hear it!

By Jennifer - jet@jetwetfun.com Tue 11/04/06 13:57:00 GMT

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Jennifer

By buddha - Tue 11/04/06 06:28:37 GMT

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